Feb. 16th, 2012

femkes_follies: (Default)
I'm coming to the conclusions that most of my dissatisfactions come from two things:

1. I have a stricter moral code than average. And this annoying habit of insisting that other people live up to it, too. Nor do I buy into situations where someone vies for a position of leadership and then refuses to try to lead because "it's too hard." Sorry, no. You wanted the big chair. You get to do something with it. Or I reserve the right to consider you a useless git.

2. I am a Scanner in a world designed for Deep Divers.

http://www.think-differently.org/2007/06/are-you-scanner-or-deep-diver/

For me, it goes way beyond multiple interests. I can certainly function in an environment where I need to focus. But even when I was in Vet School - I couldn't stand to devote all my time to school-related things. While my classmates were signing up for Foal Team and Colic Team and volunteering in the clinics - I had a NEED to be outside that little world and doing something else for at least part of the time.

I find an interest, pursue it to proficiency, and then move on. Knit or sew the same pattern more than once? Arrrggghhhhh!!!! Where is the challenge in that? But I need to be pursuing something, always. Or I get bored, the hamster gets on the wheel and my brain just runs in circles.

I'm not sure that it's true that I'm unhappy professionally. It's that I'm like Dad watching TV. He doesn't want to see what's on. He wants to see what ELSE is on. Unfortunately, channel-flipping isn't a great career move.

Possibly, if I'm to be honest with myself, this is also part of why I was so in favor of creating a Principality. I enjoyed the process of researching the history of the region, the creation of Principalities in general, the local politics, etc. And would have been much more engaged in the SCA in general with something new to "make."

I can't wrap my head around the people who contentedly plod day after day, year after year, through the same events and activities. I don't understand why people want every event to be like every other event (and clearly they do - clever event names implying some sort of underlying theme notwithstanding). I reject the insistence that change is both impossible and undesirable. And I really reject the frozen-corpse UAW culture of the Middle Kingdom. Which is really too bad, because the SCA held a wide enough range of things for Scanner Brain to be busy for many years to come.

So, possibly, what I need is a couple of things:

1. A new social circle. Y'all are great, but mostly too far away. And the local SCA people.... yeah. No. Ditto for the Autism Moms.

2. A way to keep my little Scanner Brain occupied. What I possibly need is a list of things to pursue, in sequence or simultaneously. Fabric design, wordpress theme building, gluten-free baking, etc.

3. Other scanners to connect with. This is a toughie. A lot of people think they're true scanners and really aren't. Short attention span or ADD =/= Scanner. I can think of two other true Scanners - Dad, and [identity profile] alysten.livejournal.com.

Thoughts, advice, or suggestions?
femkes_follies: (Default)
Or two. Or three. Whatever. Keep in mind here that I don't like to "make" stuff for the sake of making stuff. Make 80,000 of something to sell on Etsy? Eeek!! Not!!

So, I fully intend to stick with the baking/nascent cookbook thing. It has some potential to provide both stimulation AND income. Though I need to schedule another trip to MSU to get more base recipes.

And I'm going to take Liesl to her Irish Dance practices. Provided the new teacher doesn't flake on me, which is a possibility. In fact, I'm going to try top make a little "book" and maybe also a video for her explaining that practice is how she gets to do those crazy dance moves and get those hard shoes that I think she wants.

Let's add something. Or more than something. A couple somethings? Remember that I need something that I'm not already proficient at. And where there is some measure of "success" or other feed for the need to achieve.

1. Design some fabrics and submit to Spoonflower. I'd like to do a retro-look floral and ticking stripe voile for sheers for my front room. Maybe I can make a little to offset my own cost, eh? I might even think about learning enough graphic design and dink around with it enough to design a fabric line to shop around to some of the quilting fabric companies.

2. Aprons. I love aprons. I don't have a good reason. I should pick up the new issue of Aprononolgy. I could put together a submission for Apronology. Make a bunch of aprons out of vintage textiles, new stuff, whatever.

3. Letterboxing. This is something I could take the girls along on. Though they might be totally uninterested. Letterboxes are things you find based on directions provided by the "hider". You then stamp your logbook with the one in the box and it's logbook with YOUR stamp. I'd need to carve a stamp. And go find boxes. So that's probably a weekend-y activity.

4. Wordpress themes. I need a new one for MY blog. I could probably get to the point reasonably quickly where I could design a few more and offer them up for sale. Maybe also some vintage style party printables?

5. Back to the garden. Get some fruit trees and bushes and whatnot and get the yard in order. This one will have to wait to spring. And will be dependent on budget. But it's something I'd like to get around to eventually.

6. Paperdolls. Paperdolls are fun. I've found some cute ones that I had as a girl online. But it might be fun to do some with historical costumes, eh? Someone also suggested doll dolls. I've investigated that from time to time. But it's an expensive hobby, and I'm not sure it speaks to me. Because I'd probably either want to do Waldorf-style sewn dolls for my girls, or make my own porcelain dolls. And I'm not sure I have the sculpting techniques.

7. New embroidery. Stumpwork? Goldwork? Tambor work? I'm not one for just embroidering for embroiery's sake. It needs a purpose. Household linens, clothing, something. Or I could design some line-drawing type embroidery patterns. (i.e. redwork, but maybe in colors).

8. Dancewear. Liesl would probably like to have an Irish Dance dress to play/practice in. But I do have to say that I loathe working with poly fabrics - which is what most ID dresses are typically made of. I also like the idea of making tutus, ballet costumes, etc. But I have no idea what I'd DO with them. There is a website for a couple of ladies who sell patterns (and even do seminars) for each. I can't really afford the seminars, but maybe a pattern or book.

Anybody have thoughts? Other suggestions?

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